“And I’ll form… the Head.”

Keeping Up With the Khidashian

Episode 4: “And I’ll form… the Head.”

                Voltron was the pioneer of the formula. The Transformers perfected the formula. The Mighty Morphin’ Power Rangers Exploited, ERR TARNISHED the formula. What formula am I referring to? Why, the art of combining.

Voltron: Defender of the Universe was the first combining robot I can remember. The show, while horribly animated, was very cool in the eyes of a four year old. I mean, who wouldn’t want to pilot a giant robotic lion that can join up with its friend to become a super robot?

The Transformers, while they were technically a rip on the inferior Gobots, also stole the Voltron formula in season two by first introducing the Constructicons. To one up the Voltron force however, their first combiner was a six robot team (as opposed to five) that merged to form Devastator. A huge difference between Voltron and Transformers though, was the quality in their toys. I think I had about 4 sets of the same Voltron  because they were cheap and kept falling apart, whereas the first generation of Transformers were built like TONKA trucks. I could throw Optimus Prime through your car window and it wouldn’t have a scratch on him.

The tattoo on my leg speaks my toy/cartoon allegiance brilliantly.

Not to shit on the legacy of the Power Rangers or anything… wait, who am I kidding? The Power Rangers and everything about them were shit. The personalities, the robots, the villains, EVERYTHING… it was just a horrible show. For some reason though, kids born in the 90’s gravitated to them like they were the best thing since sliced bread. The toys were shit too. My little cousin used to dig the Rangers, while the only rangers I wanted any part of were Chip n’ Dale’s Rescue Rangers! (GOODNESS, I miss 80’s cartoons.)

What’s up with the combiners talk though? Well, you saw my last blog. Don’t act like you didn’t. 300 of you guys saw my last blog (I got the stats buddy) where I seemingly unleashed the power of my Matrix upon one of my loved ones. Yeah, that blog: the very blog that became the talk of my circle for days. It’s hidden now. I didn’t delete it because one, it was from the heart, and two it was a nice piece of short literature. It’s also definitely good reference material for my third book, which is semi-autobiographical. I digress though; the combiner talk stems from my personality. We can also file this in the About Me category.

When goaded into an argument with someone, I always try to take the high road. Speaking intelligently and geared toward problem resolution is how I do things. Think of my personality as being a three part Voltron in its own right (Pop-Up Trivia: One of those did actually exist!). The parts of my Voltron are my logic, my heart and my instincts.

When I enter battle, I’ll usually stay low key. Psychological warfare doesn’t have to grandiose to be effective.  Contrary to my last blog, most of my battles are fought in a non public matter, but certain circumstances lured me into the spotlight, and BAM, cue the fireworks! Most of my arguments are logical based, so rather than put emotions behind it, I only use facts and steps toward resolution. If emotions get involved, it’s usually my logic that calms them down and continues control. My instincts are my last line of defense (of offense, depending on the situation). When it appears that my logic and emotions are not getting the point across in an argument, my instinct is one of a killer nature.  When my instincts kick in, it commands the logic and my heart to combine with it to essentially form into my Voltron. My Voltron isn’t one what waits around getting smashed on either. Rather than the lions taking the majority of the punishment AND THEN forming Voltron, my lions are usually in control, but my instincts typically run out of patience and say to Hell with it, let’s merge and get this ro-beast the fuck out of here.

That’s the only way I can explain my explosive blog from a few days ago.  I can only go back and forth for a certain amount of time, before I lose my patience and enter Voltron mode.

 In a sense, my logic forms the feet and legs (the foundation) my heart forms the arms and torso (the will) and my instincts form the head (the leader). When the force merges to become Voltron, there may be a quick struggle, but you always know that he’s going to eventually pull that gargantuan magical sword out of nowhere and slice his opponent into oblivion.

Out of the darkness however is always a silver lining. I got the apology that I wanted, and have since de-publicized the previous blog. I may be of Decepticon allegiance, but I truly do have the heart of an Autobot.  Though I retired from the Justice League of Las Vegas, I also keep my Batman cape around here somewhere, which will probably be given to my future child. O_oBatman Beyond anyone? I guess, if they don’t join the Brotherhood of Evil Mutants or the Chicago Bulls, but we’ll see. (Easter Egg?)

Basically, I don’t like confrontation, but when I have to I can be as cold and relentless as some of the greatest villains in history. Honestly, I don’t like that trait, because I’m a loving, friendly cat, but am grateful to be blessed with it to use it when pushed…  like keeping a loaded gun in the house.

Do I think my friendship will be salvaged? Don’t know. The bridge was effectively destroyed by said sword. I would like to rehabilitate it because it is hard to walk away from someone that you’ve been cool with for so long.  If not, I’m at peace with that as well. Like I said, I have a great job, great future, great friends and an ever evolving love in my baby Kia.

Till next time spawns, try to stay out of trouble. Or not, this blog is being posted from Vegas, after all. – I am Show’Chi.

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